Silent But Deadly
September 24, 2013
Lori Kelly, David Pluscauskas, Joel Plue, Erin Berry
Jason Mewes - Thomas
William Sadler - Capper
Jordan Prentice - Sherrif Shelby
Kim Poirier - Sandra
Mark Hickox - Bobby
“Functional” might be an odd way to describe a horror movie but it’s the best single word to sum up Silent But Deadly.
Thomas (Jason Mewes – Clerks etc.) is a young man of few words, living on a farm with Pa Capper (William Sadler) and his father’s two lesbian Russian mail order brides. When caught peeping on said brides (this movie delivers boobs within 45 seconds of starting) Capper takes one of Thomas’ two beloved goats and kills him with a shotgun. Uttering “pitchfork” Thomas pins his father to a barn through his neck with the common farm implement. His wrath is then turned to the two lesbians and leaves a bloodbath in his wake. Packing up he and his one remaining goat hit the road in his pickup truck. Through a series of contrivances Thomas finds himself the new assistant to the director of a low budget horror movie. Meanwhile, Sandra is a documentarian following the exploits of little person Sherrif Shelby (Jordan Prentice – Howard the Duck) and when he then goes to the Capper place to investigate the murders Thomas committed the fates of these two groups begin to intersect. To make matters worse, Thomas does not take kindly to the mistreatment of his animal friend, who will be foolish enough to get his goat?
“Functional” might be an odd way to describe a horror movie but it’s the best single word to sum up Silent But Deadly. Jason Mewes might be the elephant in the room when it comes to this movie and how you might feel about Kevin Smith’s output but it turns out to be a non-issue. Mewes displays none of the bluster, crudity and penchant for goofy catchphrases and foul language. In fact he displays very little at all, he spends most of the movie silently glowering at everybody only speaking when naming the next implement he’s going to use as a weapon of gruesome murder.The character of Thomas is a good example of what this movie is about, no fuss, no muss, this movie sets up characters, kills them off in fun ways, and doesn’t take its time in doing so. They shoehorn in a quick romance between the two least obnoxious characters so we are given people to vaguely care about and root for, while setting everybody up for the kill. The kills themselves are quite impressive and though the gore is mainly achieved through computer graphics it’s graphic enough that it’s a lot of fun to watch.
Where this movie loses a point however is in the humor. While the deaths are fun, this film also wants to be a comedy and makes some questionable decisions in doing so. There is quite a lot of casual racism and ableism in the movie. What the movie tries to do is make sure it’s a minority making fun of another minority, so the Sheriff being a little person makes fun of a South Asian man, that same man makes fun of the Trinidadian chef by doing a bad Jamaican accent and talking about voodoo, and so on. A lot of the other “humor” in the movie falls pretty flat unless it involves somebody getting decapitated or otherwise murdered horribly. It is then to the movie’s credit that clocking in at 80 minutes with credits, Silent But Deadly is never in any danger of outstaying its welcome.
A modest little slasher that doesn’t take itself too seriously, Silent But Deadly isn’t going to win any awards but that doesn’t seem like the point and there are certainly far worse ways to spend 80 minutes.